Cultivating Spirituality After Experiencing Religious Harm

I grew up in the bible belt in a rural community in North Carolina. As a closeted Queer kid in a conservative Christian environment, I was isolated in my shame and fearful of rejection. Working through religious trauma and deconstructing shame took intentional therapeutic work of breaking down dichotomous thinking (coding the world as binary: good vs bad) and building self-compassion.

My reconnection to the divine took intentionality and time to feel more safe and secure from religious harm. There are a myriad of benefits in having a spiritual practice. Spirituality helps build community, provides meaning for suffering, and enhances our mental and physical health. My spiritual healing was a slow awakening to seeing the world not as right or wrong; instead as a conduit for connection to each other and to the spirit around us and within us.

Here are a few simple practices that cultivate a richer connection to the spirit.

1. Create a morning ritual that celebrates life. When I wake up, I slowly notice the sights and sounds of the morning: Poopy, (our front pond bull frog), makes his presence known, the cicadas hum, and my wife snuggles closer. These small micro moments fill me with peace and gratitude, reminding me of my connection to the world around me.

2. Find meaning in the struggle. What would it be like that with each difficult situation, you acted as though you had chosen it? When we suffer, we struggle in understanding the why. Searching for your why can help in accepting our most painful situations. Spirituality can help bolster us through hardship and strengthen our resilience.

3. Notice the small ways love appears in your life. We are spiritually wired to love and to feel belonging. By noticing the small ways love appears in your life, the connection to yourself, to your community, and to the divine will expand.