Resilience in the Face of Oppression: Self-Care, Grief and Healing
Grief is a powerful emotion that we often associate with personal loss. However, it can also be a response to collective and societal injustices. Today, we want to acknowledge the deep grief many of us feel regarding the innocent lives lost. Israeli and Palestinian families are torn apart. We grieve the ongoing oppression, murder, and dehumanization of the Palestinian people in the last 75 years. We grieve for the Jewish community, who endured centuries-long displacement, persecution, genocide, and oppression. We know, as therapists, that when traumatized beings do not heal their trauma and move from a place of fear, they, too, have the potential to traumatize others. We believe that Jewish people deserve safety and dignity, but this cannot be at the expense of the safety and dignity of others.
The dehumanization Palestinians face is a grave injustice that should concern us all. Our collective grief in the face of such widespread suffering is appropriate and a testament to our shared humanity. Our grief is evolving from exposure to secondary trauma as we witness ethnic cleansing, displacement, and war terrorism.
Amid conflict and oppression, it's crucial to prioritize self and collective care and healing for those affected by the atrocities that are taking place. If we move solely from our dysregulated nervous systems, we fear that we will continue to witness more violence, disconnection, and binary thinking.
It is my hope that my words will provide resources and strategies to connect to your grief, empowerment, and social justice. Here are a few essential concepts to focus on as you process the Palestine/Israel war.
Educate Yourself:
Start by learning about the historical and current issues in the region, acknowledging the pain and suffering endured by Palestinians and Israelis.
Active Listening: Create a safe space for those oppressed and affected to share their experiences, emotions, and stories.
Actively listen without judgment, unsolicited advice, or solutions. Humans want space to exist freely, even in shared silence, roars, and screams.
Mental and Emotional Self-Care:
Prioritize self-compassion. Understand that it's okay to feel anger, sadness, and grief. Many of us are experiencing secondary trauma from the mass murders of children and families in the name of an unjust and inhumane system. Secondary trauma will bring up grief, helplessness, and despair. Your body is taking in trauma through witnessing the suffering and potentially tying these experiences to the existing traumas it holds.
Limit exposure to graphic media, but stay informed from reliable sources.
Engage in mindfulness, meditation, or deep breathing exercises to manage emotional distress.
Advocacy and Solidarity:
Use your voice and platform to advocate for peace, human rights, and an end to oppression.
Support and amplify Palestinian and Jewish voices and perspectives through interfaith dialogues.
Connect with support groups or organizations that work toward peace, justice, and reconciliation in the region. Here are a few to get you started!
Attend or organize events that raise awareness and foster dialogue (see the link below!).
Self-Care Practices:
Seek professional support through support groups or individual counseling services.
Engage in basic needs until you can expand your capacity for future care.
How can you show up for yourself in times of suffering, grief, and loss?
Body: Stretch your body, go for a walk, scream into a pillow, or take a mindless walk without music.
Sleep: Lay in the bed and count to 100
Nutrition: Try having small and nutritious meals throughout the day. Simultaneously, support your local Palestinian restaurant or grocery store!
Hygiene: Splash some cold water or wipe your face with a towel soaked in lukewarm water.
Social: connect with your community of peers, activists, family, or mutual aid.
Cultural Exchange:
Learn about Jewish and Palestinian culture, art, and history to foster understanding and appreciation.
Share your own culture and values to promote dialogue.
Respect Boundaries: Understand that not everyone may want to discuss the conflict, and respecting their boundaries is crucial.
Humanitarian Support:
Contribute to humanitarian aid efforts for Palestinians and Jews affected by the conflict.
Stay informed about organizations supporting these efforts.
Long-Term Commitment: Recognize that the conflict's resolution is a complex, ongoing process. Continue your commitment to social justice beyond moments of crisis.
For Your Reflection:
Take a moment to focus on the following reflection questions that will highlight your grief and self-compassion.
What specific experiences of oppression or discrimination have you faced in your life?
Reflect on the instances or circumstances that have made you feel marginalized or oppressed.
How has this oppression affected your emotional well-being and self-esteem?
Consider the emotional toll it has taken on you, including any self-doubt or negative self-perception.
What are the societal or systemic factors that contribute to the oppression you've experienced?
Analyze the larger context and systems that perpetuate these inequalities.
What are your coping mechanisms for dealing with grief and injustice?
Explore how you've managed your emotions, both positively and negatively.
Have you sought support from friends, family, or professionals to address your grief and emotional well-being?
Reflect on your support network and whether you've shared your experiences with others.
What does self-compassion mean to you?
Define what self-compassion looks like in your life and how you currently practice it.
Do you find it challenging to be kind and understanding to yourself in the face of oppression? Why or why not?
Consider any self-criticism or self-blame that may be hindering self-compassion.
Can you identify any self-limiting beliefs or negative self-talk related to your experiences of oppression?
Think about the harmful narratives you may have internalized and how they impact your self-compassion.
What self-care practices help you soothe your grief and build self-compassion?
List the activities or strategies that provide comfort and emotional healing.
How can you integrate self-compassion into your daily life to better navigate the grief of oppression?
Create a plan for incorporating self-compassion into your routines and interactions.
What emotions are you experiencing, and how do they manifest physically and emotionally?
How has the situation impacted your sense of identity and belonging?
What actions, even small ones, can you take to make a positive difference?
How can you balance staying informed with avoiding information overload?
What are your sources of strength and resilience during this challenging time?
How can you engage in conversations with people of differing opinions respectfully and constructively?
Remember that self-care and healing are essential aspects of resistance against oppression. By prioritizing your well-being and seeking justice, you contribute to a brighter, more equitable future for Palestinians and oppressed communities.